My first semester

Is been one semester since I joined college. I only have the exams remaining. Now, it’s time to reflect on the comings and goings, adventures and misadventures, thoughts and actions that have transpired through this semester.
It was a disappointing entry into college. I’d aimed for IITs, slipped NITs and landes at SASTRA.
My only consolation was that this university was supposed to be very ethical – no seats for money, no favours, etc. Much to my dismay this turned put false. I’d already voiced my discontent with NRI quota on Facebook and my conviction only became stronger after observing the supposed NRIs – 12 lakhs for their degree and still they are wasteful, vain and corrupt in every imaginable aspect.
I initially shared my room with three people. Two of them left to pursue other educational avenues each for a reason of his own. The one that remained took advantage. Now I’m forced to share my room with nearly 10 people. I recognize my unwillingness to share with people as one of my character flaws but this was just too much. Naturally there are NRIs amongst those extra 6 people, who are above everyone else and don’t feel the need to follow rules or attend classes or even study.
As for my own academics, I studied almost every day. I am sure that I have spent more time studying per day at university than at school. I realised the importance of my education to my family – bereft of lasting financial resources, my importance had risen over the years. I am remorseful for not having studied with the same fervour at school. I solemnly resolved to destroy all the obstacles in the way of my success.
But it turned out that I wasn’t completely heartless – I couldn’t just complain that my room wasn’t peaceful. But finally, after gruelling internal debates between my sense of responsibility and my sense of pity for the parents of those who plaqued my room, I went ahead and complained. But since NRIs and their companions are above rules (and later in life – law), there wasn’t much improvement in my situation. My university had failed to provide to me what was promised – a peaceful place to claim as my own. I had to make a second request/complaint after which there was only a marginal improvement. But it was made clear by the authority that if o make one more complaint my room mates will be expelled – refuelling the internal conflict of sense and sensibility.
I have to admit that I am much awed by my self proclaimed roommates’ and invaders’ audacity. They are a well knit group – what some may call a gang – sworn to secrecy and unity at all costs. The costs obviously would be greater for their parents and families rather than themselves, but this, they do not realise. They have chosen a path of fun and frolic. Its true that it looks very green and gay from my path of honor, code and education which looks gray and lonely.
My grades have been sufficiently high. I have enjoyed sitting in most of my classes and have gained much knowledge both from lectures and from my peers. My attendance stands at a lofty 99.2 percent. I’m hoping to secure the scholarship and kick start my role as my family’s savior.
On the whole, it’s been a year that I identify with school except for the fact that I am making more efforts to gain knowledge and in extension marks. It’s almost a carbon copy of my inability to make stable relationships that don’t appear to implode imminently.


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